melayneseahawk: (filthy hippie)
Finally returning to LJ. And since a lot has happened in the past months, I thought I'd meme it up to catch everyone up.

Also, I've been on LJ eight years today. Terrifying.

Journal Entries: 1,470
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Communities moderated/created: [livejournal.com profile] fandom_grammar (created), [livejournal.com profile] jd_ficathon (created)

long meme under the cut )
melayneseahawk: (crazy)
Very overdue. Here's a basic overview of the last few months:

- moved to Pittsburgh in the middle of August for school
- started school the end of August; had a panic attack in my first class on my first day, but managed to go to classes the rest of that first week
- went to Dragon*Con, came back with a cold
- was unable to get to class for about a month; finally checked myself into the psych ER because I wasn't eating, and wasn't getting care since I didn't have a doctor yet; after some insurance company drama, I spent two nights in a partial inpatient program before returning to my apartment
- began attending an intensive outpatient program, which consisted of group and individual therapy and medication management
- went back to school for three weeks, and was doing pretty much fine, but then fell apart again; formally withdrew from school, with the intention of returning in the fall due to prereqs and stuff
- had another breakdown after Thanksgiving, which lead to me losing the job I had managed to get after withdrawing from school

Since then, I've finally found a doctor here in the Burgh, and we're starting to try to find an appropriate drug cocktail to get me functional again. It's...not pretty, but I'm still here, and I'll take what I can get.
melayneseahawk: (adult)
Updating from a Starbucks, where I am mooching Internet. There's been some big changes around here. I'll try to give you all the highlights:

I have moved from Washington DC to Pittsburgh, to finally complete my stage management BFA. Classes start Monday, which gives me this week to unpack and get settled in. The move itself was not without incident: massive storms in the drive up, the power was out when we got here, and then the elevator broke down once the power came back on. Dad and I managed to haul everything up the four flights of stairs to my place--even the seven boxes of books and the a/c unit--install the a/c, and do a massive grocery haul. I'm gradually unpacking and arranging everything, though this is complicated by the fact that Verizon is being idiotic about my Internet, and I may not have any until the end of September. Bleh.

In other news, I am also preparing for Dragon*Con, which I am really looking forward to this year. I have a bunch of new costumes, and intend to take full advantage of my free status this year. I am going to panels. I am going to parties. I am going to haggle in the dealer rooms. I am going to have fun.

[livejournal.com profile] jd_ficathon is still on this year, of course. Go to the comm (or its DW sister of the same name) to see the rules and sign up. Sign-ups end on Friday.

Will update again when I'm mooching next!
melayneseahawk: (academic terms)
Not dead, just really busy. I'm currently at Orientation for NewSchool, killing time between things. Will have a more complete update when I get home on Monday.

big update is big

Thursday, 19 May 2011 10:36
melayneseahawk: (caffeinated)
Ye gods, I hadn't realized that it had been so long since I posted. Wow. I have been busy, at least. Here's the basics:

Done done done with classes at the community college. I'm not done with school, of course, but at least I'm done with that shithole.

I got into Point Park, and the Conservatory offered me $14k in grants as long as I keep my grades up. Which, since that's my plan anyway, is freaking awesome. And that's not including work study and anything else I get in the way of financial aid from the university itself. So, I'm going to be in Pittsburgh in the fall. Now to work out the details: orientation, sorting out an error with my FAFSA, apartment hunting, etc.

I'm still working at the theatre on campus, but I'm off hunting for a second job, so I can earn some more money. I'm spreading the net really wide, of course, which means lots of retail and waitressing. Hopefully I'll get something, but I'm really hoping for the pirate tavern (no joke) or Victoria's Secret (employee discount!), or something I can wear t-shirts and jeans to. I want so much, I know.

I should be writing, but instead I've been helping the Geekling fill out job apps for himself. If I thought one set was killing my soul, just imagine how two sets is making me feel. *stabs eyes*

update

Thursday, 3 March 2011 21:45
melayneseahawk: (school)
Four interviews down (Boston, Emerson, Point Park, DePaul), two to go. Miami is scheduled for Monday. VCU is being odd. I will harass them next week.

Still have not taken make-up exam from last semester. This is getting downright pathetic. Anyone want to take some time Tuesday morning and drive my ass down to campus and make me sit this test? *sigh*

There are two other Big Things I need to talk about, but they'll each get their own post. Expect spammity over the next few days.

Now to break my heart all over again avoid writing.
melayneseahawk: (school)
Two interviews down, four to go. I'm doing a daytrip (*headdesk*) up to Pittsburgh tomorrow for one interview, one will be on the phone, and two have not been scheduled yet. It's very exciting. And by exciting, I mean nerve-wracking.

Further updates will be available later this weekend, after I get back.
melayneseahawk: (headdesk)
Power outage was extended until 5p...and they announced it at noon. So, I wasted two hours on that damn campus, when I could have been home.

And they didn't have one of the textbooks I needed, so now I get to wait until they get in more from...somewhere. *headdesk*

On the plus side, I started working on my Archive of Our Own account, and managed to get 25 stories up and published, so that was nice.

Hopefully tomorrow will be more productive.

Gar.

Friday, 16 October 2009 00:43
melayneseahawk: (deadline screwed)
Right now, I have:

a headache
a case of insomnia
a paragraph and a half on Egyptian statuary

I need:
a two-page paper on the above topic
sleep
an Advil

[Yes, I know, I used to be able to do a paper twice this length in a single sitting, but I just haven't been able to concentrate all day.]

I have to be awake an functional (with the paper done, natch) in five hours.

*headdesk*
melayneseahawk: (vent)
- Dragon*Con: I'll post my pictures, but I've decided that giving a complete rundown of my weekend will likely piss someone off, and I don't really feel the need to rehash it anyway. This one you can ask me about if you want.

- the whole Roman Polanski thing. If you don't know my opinion of the situation, you don't know me, and it can't be good for my blood pressure to write about it in depth.

- filling out paperwork for new doctor I'll be seeing in November, and the fact that having to put my medical history down on paper is fucking depressing.

- the fact that I'm theoretically finished with my involvement with UMD Vagina Monologues (even though I expect S and crew to call me once a week to ask me questions), and it's making me kind of sad.

- the fact that winter is coming and I am perpetually cold.

- the fact that I pretty much hate my life right now, including, but not confined to: my only social life these days is confined to going places with my parents; how much I hate going to class, even the classes I'm theoretically enjoying; etc.

Less depressing content later.
melayneseahawk: (research)

The people at the Smithsonian have a really weird sense of humor...

Museum trips were successful. I have a couple of options for my first paper, extras that could be used for the journal, and had a yummy lunch. Not a bad way to spend a Saturday.

I've already gone driving today, in which I actually ran errands and drove all over the place. Still not awesome at stopping smoothly, but it's better. Now to start working on history notes until my hands cramp.
Tags:
melayneseahawk: (dead)
Bah, what a week.

I've been functional and feeling well-enough everyday--minus the random crying jags prompted by everything from music about politics to diaper advertisements--but I'm not feeling great. The shrink and I agree that this is not where I want to be, but we're hesitant to try anything drastic, since at lease I'm mostly functional now, and it could get a lot worse if we do try something new. So, I wait until winter break, and we try something new then.

I'm finally caught up in classes, though I'm probably going to be behind again after this weekend. The hardest part is American history. The prof tests from the textbook without going over the material in class (unless asked), and since I don't think in highlighted bars I decided to take notes on the textbook. Jesus Christ, though. The book is really well written but very, very dense. I worked on the seventy pages assigned on and off for almost two weeks. It was killer. And now I have another two chapters, roughly the same number of pages, to take notes on for Monday. Eep. I also had a test in the same class today, and while I definitely wrote too much on the essay section, I think I did alright.

Art history is stereotypically vague and completely useless, but the book is good so I'll be fine. The world music class is awesome all over, and the prof likes me because I have experience in music analysis, so smooth sailing there.

Mum's in Florida with the grandparentals, so I'm going to museums with Dad this weekend. He's hitting up a photography exhibit at the Corcoran, and I'm going to the Freer-Sackler to look at Egyptian glasswork for art history. I'm definitely going to be doing a lot of museum crawling this semester, since the art history prof assigned two papers (two pages each, which is a sneeze) and a six-section "journal". No big.

(If I sound like I'm writing things off, I'm really not. It's mostly bravado.)
melayneseahawk: (existential)
Yesterday, my mother and I donated five bags of toys to Interfaith Clothing Centers, which is pretty much what the name is. They gather clothing, toys, and school supplies and then give them out to local families in need through a network of religious institutions. I've got another bag of toys, plus at least three bags of clothes to go through and drop off, possibly as soon as next weekend, plus a whole pile of old board games and things in the dining room.

I'm also prepping furniture and baby things to give to A Wider Circle, which focuses on getting families--especially new families--settled with the things they need to make a home. Finally, all this "junk" that's been sitting around my house can be repurposed and given to someone who can use it.

Also went driving yesterday. I'm slowly getting better with this; it would help if I actually practiced more often. :(

I'm still playing catch-up with classwork stuff. I have some seventy pages to read and take notes on for history, plus three powerpoints, and twenty pages to read for art history. And I'm waiting for the music prof to get back to me with the powerpoints I missed. All I can say is yargh.

Oh, and I quit my job on Friday. Retail hell would have been survivable, but I really didn't appreciate being shat on regularly because I was the newest employee. The 'rents are already paying for all the necessities--which all I'm spending, anyway, now that D*C is over--so I'm not really hurting for money. And considering how my mental state has been, I'm not ready for the added stress that particular job was causing. Maybe I'll resume the hunt in a few weeks.

Once I'm caught up for the semester, there will be fic. I have a collection of short things that are close to done that I intend to pick off one by one. And not just Stargate; there's Harry Potter and original stuff on that list, as well as crossovers such as An Apple a Day and the Stargate/X-Files one I mentioned at the D*C general fanfic panel. I'm going to do my own Bunny Euthanasia Project this October, in the hope of clearing my To Write list and bringing it down to manageable sizes.

I do intend to finish my [livejournal.com profile] stargate_summer on my own, rather than wait until next year. Quick opinion poll: The first part is already done, and the second will be done soon. Do people want me to post in installments--knowing that this is not some endless WIP--or just wait until it's all done?
melayneseahawk: (crisis)
I didn't remember this morning, but Saturday night I dreamed that I missed class on Monday because I slept through. Premonition, or power of suggestion?

Or maybe I just suck.

E-mailed profs (told them I was sick) and shrink. Shrink wants me to lower Seroquel dose (done, but how long until it's out of my system enough to stop working?) and make an appointment to see him. One prof's gotten back to me and told me all I missed was intro stuff, so I'd be fine, but didn't bother to send me the syllabus. Arg.

On the plus side, I did the [livejournal.com profile] jd_ficathon matches today, with minimal incident. And I think I managed to send them all out without sending them to the wrong person or anything.

Work had better be easy tomorrow, or else I may run screaming into the night.

Don't Panic!

Friday, 7 August 2009 23:01
melayneseahawk: (the guide)
I will not panic that there are only 10 people signed up for [livejournal.com profile] jd_ficathon. The month is young.

I will not panic that I've spent the last two days in a depressed state. I will call my doctor. Not likely.)

I will not panic that MC hasn't put up book lists yet. There are a large number of bookstores in my area, I will be able to buy what I need.

I will not panic that my brother is completely unprepared for college. It is Not My Problem.

I will not panic that my [livejournal.com profile] stargate_summer is not moving at all.

No, wait, I will panic about that last one.
melayneseahawk: (wench)
Busy day yesterday and today:

Yesterday:
~ send Beat the Geek tests in
~ put up [livejournal.com profile] jd_ficathon sign-up post and pimp
~ remove all tags from new work clothes
~ clean room
~ pay for fall classes
~ go to Israeli bond office and get check for most recent matured bond (money will pay 'rents back for classes, and then part is going into a CD)
~ send e-mail to [livejournal.com profile] stargate_summer beta


Today:
~ make cards for people already signed up for [livejournal.com profile] jd_ficathon (we've got ten people already!)
~ watch Star Trek: First Contact so it can be returned
~ clean desk
~ call the Maryland Comptroller's Office again (they're very, very stupid)
~ shower
~ make limeade

~ wash floors
~ lots of laundry

A few things.

Thursday, 16 July 2009 17:23
melayneseahawk: (solitaire)
Managed to complete or otherwise deal with all three things I listed to get done last night, so that's fun. Next week, I get to go to banks to get actual CD rates, and Mum and I have to arrange to get to the Israeli bond office so I can actually get a check for the money from the bond that matured. Wow, moneys, I (sort of) has them.

Also, [livejournal.com profile] tigerlilly2063 has finished playing with the layout for [livejournal.com profile] jd_ficathon. It looks great!

D&D with [livejournal.com profile] allandaros and the crew tonight, which should be fun. I haven't played D&D since high school, and any tabletop RPG since 2007 or so. I'm looking forward to it.

I think I've banged out some of the "this makes no sense" kinks in what of Act II is already drafted. I still have no idea what I'm doing, but at least I'm not bumbling in the right direction (I hope).

Oh, and I've been assigned an artist, so that's exciting. I think s/he reads this journal, so if you do, a note: [livejournal.com profile] helsmeta has the draft of Act I, and should be sending it to you soon, but you're welcome (and encouraged!) to e-mail me if you have any questions/comments/thoughts/etc. I'm totally open to suggestions. Plus, if we're in contact, I can send you the draft of Act II as soon as it's done, rather than going through her. Also, there's one major structural issue in Act I that might mean a few scenes will be removed, so you might want to know that in advance.

Imma stop rambling now and: finish my salad, finish the scene I'm working on (it's a fun one!), and get as much snippeting down before I leave for the Metro station in an hour. Fun times.

Edit In case anyone's curious, the count for Act II is now up to 8050 and I'm shutting it down so I can leave for the station in a few.
melayneseahawk: (CHA)
OMG IT WAS A GROUP INTERVIEW!!!

Words cannot express my displeasure about this.

Well, one way or the other, I should find out in a few days. I'll likely have to drop my first paycheck on clothes to be able to wear to work (I shop at the store occasionally, but uniform is clothes from that store, and I have pants but no shirts). I also dropped of the applications I'd done for a few other places, because I want to cover my bases. We'll see what happens.

Next tasks to tackle: a coherent e-mail to [livejournal.com profile] indywind about some plot development issues; the community college's online course catalogue, and registration; D&D tomorrow with [livejournal.com profile] allandaros and the gang. I still haven't picked my spell paths. Eep?
melayneseahawk: (crazy)
(spammity spam spam, sorry)

Yeah, so I said I was going to do a life update. So, lessee...

Starting driver's ed on Monday, which should be boring as hell but hopefully worth it. To those of you up-county,, I'll be in Rockville and free as a bird after about 1:30p Mon-Thu this coming week. So this would be a good time to hang out, right? *very strong hint I'm losing my mind here...*

I'm thisclose to finishing my shift supervisor training. My boss gets back from vacation on Monday, and we're going to finish my last little bits of meeting with her (and the class, God help me) so I can be formally certified. And then I get a nametag on my mail cubby! *is way too excited about this*

I started meeting with a medicating psychiatrist last week, and we're going to be meeting again this coming Friday so we can actually start a treatment plan. I'm really, really not happy about the idea of going on meds (again) but it looks to be the only option, at least for the time being. On the plus side, once I'm more internally reliable (Phrase I coined in therapy a few weeks ago. Shut up, every little bit helps sometimes.), I can focus on the college search and getting the hell out of here.

Speaking of family, remember the bets on whether Mum would get mad? It seems like they've decided to completely stop talking to me. It's quarter to 8p on a Saturday night, and I have no idea where they are. It's mildly disconcerting, actually.

And they highlight of last week? It was C the Awesome Roommate's birthday on Thursday, so a few of us took her out to a bar near campus. Of course, when we went out on the dance floor some sketchtastic guy plastered himself to my ass, and I looked to C to rescue me (since she was the one whose eyes I caught first).

Her solution? To pretend to make out with me and pull me into the group and away from Sketchy.

It was hilarious. Everyone on the floor around us stopped short, and the group we were with started cheering. And the kicker? We were completely faking the kiss, and not even A and C's best friend, who were standing on either side of us, could tell. Note to self: just work your jaw when you're pretending to kiss someone, and it makes it look like there's a hell of a lot more going on there.
melayneseahawk: (crazy)
(spammity spam spam, sorry)

Yeah, so I said I was going to do a life update. So, lessee...

Starting driver's ed on Monday, which should be boring as hell but hopefully worth it. To those of you up-county,, I'll be in Rockville and free as a bird after about 1:30p Mon-Thu this coming week. So this would be a good time to hang out, right? *very strong hint I'm losing my mind here...*

I'm thisclose to finishing my shift supervisor training. My boss gets back from vacation on Monday, and we're going to finish my last little bits of meeting with her (and the class, God help me) so I can be formally certified. And then I get a nametag on my mail cubby! *is way too excited about this*

I started meeting with a medicating psychiatrist last week, and we're going to be meeting again this coming Friday so we can actually start a treatment plan. I'm really, really not happy about the idea of going on meds (again) but it looks to be the only option, at least for the time being. On the plus side, once I'm more internally reliable (Phrase I coined in therapy a few weeks ago. Shut up, every little bit helps sometimes.), I can focus on the college search and getting the hell out of here.

Speaking of family, remember the bets on whether Mum would get mad? It seems like they've decided to completely stop talking to me. It's quarter to 8p on a Saturday night, and I have no idea where they are. It's mildly disconcerting, actually.

And they highlight of last week? It was C the Awesome Roommate's birthday on Thursday, so a few of us took her out to a bar near campus. Of course, when we went out on the dance floor some sketchtastic guy plastered himself to my ass, and I looked to C to rescue me (since she was the one whose eyes I caught first).

Her solution? To pretend to make out with me and pull me into the group and away from Sketchy.

It was hilarious. Everyone on the floor around us stopped short, and the group we were with started cheering. And the kicker? We were completely faking the kiss, and not even A and C's best friend, who were standing on either side of us, could tell. Note to self: just work your jaw when you're pretending to kiss someone, and it makes it look like there's a hell of a lot more going on there.

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