it’s really good to see you rocking out and having fun

Have been having nightmares the last few days of being in my house and there being monsters or robbers or [insert fantastical whatever here] trying to get in. I don't need a dream dictionary or a shrink to translate them.

It's clear my subconscious is worried about leaving my comfort zone. The house is safe, not somewhere I'm trapped.

The medicine cocktail I'm on right now seems to be working. I still have less-than-great days, but I think I'm ready to start job hunting, and maybe moving out again once I have employment. Then from there the plan is to go back to taking classes this summer, and maybe Fall 2011 will be my triumphant(?) return to the world of the four year college.

My birthday is in two weeks, and I'm going to be old enough that I've had friends I've known for over a decade and friends are moving in with their SOs and getting married and moving on. And I've spent the last couple years raging about the fact that I haven't been doing the same.

And now that I am? It's quite clear that at least part of me is terrified.

Here's hoping I can cope.