highrise living for a joke like me

Thank you to everyone who made this a fabulous show, and a fabulous run, and a fabulous four years. I love all of you, and those I hate I dislike for a very good reason. *cough*Matt*cough*Tamara*cough*

Anyway, it totally hasn't sunk in that this is the beginning of the end. All we've got left is Set Strike, Inductions, and the picnic. I've never been to the picnic. Maybe I should go this year. *ponders*

Cast party was a bit of a let-down, but that's not the end of the world. There was no dancing, really, and none of my alums and awards were mostly blah. Though Michael a.k.a. Kurt is my favorite child under 13 now. Love that kid.

But spending a few hours curled up on a couch with a certain bothersomely-special someone made it all worthwhile. It's amazing how soothing the sound of someone else's breathing can be, even if said person is snoring. And he stayed under the sleeping bag with me even though he knows. Yes, I fully see the irony in the repetition of this conversation and spring cast parties.

He thinks he's my bad habit. That I fall back on him since I'm lonely. But it's more than that. Lonely I can handle, my dear. I don't know how to put it into words, but it's true. I'm sorry, but I told you you didn't want to know.

I knew I'd go grey early, but I wasn't expecting to do so before my 18th birthday! Don't laugh at me too hard tomorrow.

And, oh, how the mighty have fallen. I'm skipping history tomorrow so that I can not fail my Cold War test. *dies*

The show will come together, I suppose. . .

And so Hell Week begins tomorrow.

What else is there to say?

Gah.

It's great to see you, but you're a few weeks late, darling.

Tech rehearsal was a success, if success is determined by how early you get out. The set is a fecking disaster, but we all knew that. My feather duster is t3h s3xy and I get to wear a tie. Hurrah?

Celebriel, I will always love you, you know that, no matter who you fall for. And I won't kill him, but only because you told me not to. It's not as bad as the last times, so I guess it's ok.

Dad told me that he'd heard from a very reliable source that the snail got into West Point. And my heart fluttered. And this was after dreaming about him in three separate dreams last night. God damn you, get out of my mind and heart, since I know you'll never be in my arms.


You're the Tortured Intellectual!
Take What sort of Hipster are you? today!
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You scored as Existentialism. Your life is guided by the concept of Existentialism:  You choose the meaning and purpose of your life. “Man is condemned to be free; because once thrown into the world, he is responsible for everything he does.” “It is up to you to give [life] a meaning.” --Jean-Paul Sartre “It is man's natural sickness to believe that he possesses the Truth.” --Blaise Pascal More info at Arocoun's Wikipedia User Page... Existentialism 85% Hedonism 75% Utilitarianism 75% Justice (Fairness) 60% Kantianism 55% Strong Egoism 35% Nihilism 35% Apathy 30% Divine Command 10% What philosophy do you follow? (v1.02) created with QuizFarm.com

Which Famous Homosexual Are You?
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Wandered around Georgetown today with David and a friend of his. It was funny, but I swear the two of them looked like a gay couple. Especially when we went into Banana Republic and they tried on matching shirts. It didn't help that the clerk was flaming, and kept giving me that "You have no chance with them, you fag hag" smile, but I was in stitches. And David cannot walk down the street without turning to watch every hot chick that walks by. It was most amusing, I must say.

Also finished the book for East Asian today. It will work for the class, but I didn't enjoy it. Now all I have this weekend is 2.5 hrs of rehearsals, A Farewell to Arms to read, Of Mice and Men to record, Davidowitz to start, and chores.

Going to go look at the seriously gorgeous dress tomorrow. I won't be able to buy it, I bet, because it will cost a fecking fortune, but a girl can dream, can't she?

Well, racy composer jokes at 11:45p are a pretty good indicator I'm losing my mind.

The tableaux went rather well, despite John and Jan being relatively useless. Beth, I love you because we still have a spark after all these years. And Rachel and John planted to make trouble after the tableaux were fabulous. Kudos to you both.

I can't decide whether I love or hate Ben the Tool for bringing the boy over to run lines with us. It was rather amusing that in the hallway I knew them all and in front of Saul and the Dramamama I kept fucking up.

And our water isn't working again. Joy.

And I still seem to be having a negative aura or whatever:


Discworld: Which Ankh-Morpork City Watch Character are YOU?
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On my own, pretending he's beside me.
All alone I walk with him till morning.
Without him I feel his arms around me.
And when I lose my way I close my eyes and he has found me.

In the rain, the pavement shines like silver.
All the lights are misty in the river.
In the darkness the trees are full of starlight.
And all I see is him and me forever and forever.

And I know it's only in my mind
That I'm talking to myself and not to him.
And although I know that he is blind
Still I say there's a way for us.

I love him, but when the night is over,
He is gone, the river's just a river.
Without him the world around me changes.
The trees are bare and everywhere the streets are full of strangers.

I love him but every day I'm learning
All my life I've only been pretending.
Without me his world will go on turning.
The world is full of happiness that I have never known.

I love him,
I love him,
I love him,
But only on my own.

Ok, managed to do my English oral and defeat Andariel in the same day. And this makes me happy. I'm such a nerd.

I will be a nun for this show, for at least the first scene. Current name is Sister Mary Elphaba (since the Dramamama says all nuns are Mary something). Please suggest options.

The guy who plays the character one of my characters is married to left the board, so now I have to cover for the departure. I don't want to play a 31-year-old drunken and depressed Irishman. I just don't! [But maybe it'll be cathartic for other things.]

And I got the B I needed on the Calc mid-term. W00t!

The real reason I'm so mad at David is because his actions are causing me to have to re-evaluate our whole relationship. I really don't want to have to do this. And I'm kicking myself for dragging Shagun into this. I've been in her position before; I can't believe I'd forgotten how much it hurts. At least I'm not asking her take sides. And it's also nice to know that other people really care enough to be genuinely worried about my well-being in this situation. I love you all.

Oh, my God, my life is starting to sound like a soap opera. Scratch that, it already did, but I was just ignoring it. What should it be called, d'ya think?

My schedule sucks, since the order is wacked. I'm taking more academic classes this semester than I did last semester; how sad. But I love Ms. Niewiaroski (more on her someother time); she's just amazing.

I'm a second semester senior. *waits for that to sink in*

David is officially on my shit list. Do I come across as easy or something? And anyway, if you have feelings for someone, you tell hir rather than feeling hir up. Asshole.

I'm finishing the erstwhile Six Friends for this CenterStage playwright competition. Ah, the joy of middle school memories and inside jokes. Neeli says it's funny, so I can make it work.

And I might be a nun for this play, too. Should I be Sister Elphaba or Sister Isolde?

Have finally gotten enough sleep to coherently type. Kept drifting off in classes yesterday and wound up taking a nap during the assembly period. Voice was ok, but I was singing rather low, though I hit the high C#, so ignore me. Don't remember much else.

Today I give mad props to Samuel Evans and Shagun Raina, with minor props to David. Y'all know why. Just wish me luck, and let me borrow your couch when they kick me out.

Frau Schmidt is 54 years old, has worked for the von Trapp family since before WWI, and is a passive, loyal person. And her first name is Greta or Helga or Isolde or something.

And TOK is eating my soul.

Well, another break has come and gone. Yes, the school work is done (well, most of it), but I still feel like I wasted my free time on sleeping insanely late, playing Diablo, and cross-stitching. Ah, c'est la vie, non?

To end my break I saw The Phantom of the Opera with my father. The music was cool but they kept forgetting their consonants. And it had a happy ending, for God's sake! Please tell me the play isn't like that.

Final Version of the Break To-Do List (in no particular order)
~ Read Heart of Darkness
~ Finish the ballad
~ Write half my history IA
~ Research Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
~ Do the TOK Section III (postponed until after break)
~ Physics lab and worksheets (3)
~ Read Of Mice and Men and begin recording
~ Read Dracula
~ WRITE!!!!!
~ Hang out with friends
~ SLEEP SLEEP SLEEP
~ Clean room
~ Work on lines
~ Work on monologues/songs
~ Find my old English journal
~ Find my TOK stuff (postponed until after break)